Perception vs. Reality

"I'm not organized enough to use a garden planner". "You're so organized".

I hear these types of comments at festivals, farmers' markets and other events. A lot. And they make me a little sad, because the truth of the matter is that I'm not organized. Like, at all. If I were actually organized, none of my workbooks would exist. Zero. I made them to help me, a totally not-organized garden lover, to become a better gardener.

The seed packets in this photo represent less than 1/10 of the collection of expired seeds that I gathered from around the house, barn, shop and vehicles. I have that large collection of expired seeds because I went shopping without a plan, multiple times over the years.

I love to research. I love to shop for seeds and tools and plants in the Spring, and I even love to plant (some of) those seeds and (most of) those plants. I don't mind watering to get things established, and I like to look at pretty flowers and healthy herbs and vegetables in the garden. But, I totally hate weeding (tedious, repetitive work that makes me want to crawl out of my skin).

If my garden tools are where they belong, it's generally not because I personally put them there.

I just don't remember things like the name of the person I was just introduced to (though I am working on that), or the date I planted the tomatoes, or when I (or someone else) fertilized the fruit trees. I always think I'll remember, but I just don't.

I've wasted a lot of time feeling guilty about those shortcomings, but guilt is a stifling, self-defeating emotion. I've chosen to let go of that guilt and instead just accept that I am who and what I am. I find that it is more productive and empowering to be realistic about my shortcomings and find tools and tactics to compensate for them. Trying to force a square peg into a round hole is kind of pointless.

That is precisely why I made the garden planners, journals and workbooks. They do the remembering, because I can't/don't/won't. Plus, they're pretty, because I don't think function and practicality have to exclude beauty. Part of that beauty, is that they're quiet. No app notifications, no blue light, no timers. I write things down when I need to, and the information is safely and silently tucked away until I need it.

What you see at the markets is a booth that was set up with the help of 2-3 other people. It's the result of countless hours of research and trial and error to create something that is attractive and manageable to set up and transport. The product assembly, packaging, signage, booth displays and transportation are the combination of my ideas, brought to life with the help of 3 other people who have chosen to support my dream. They are not the result of any kind of naturally-occurring organization on my part.

My workbooks and journals exist because my husband and my daughters have picked up the slack around meal preparation, grocery shopping, housework, weeding, animal husbandry and proofreading, which afforded me the time and focus to work on writing and designing my workbooks. They are not the work of an organized person. They are tools created by a disorganized gardener who become a better gardener. It's my hope that those tools can help you to become a better gardener, too.